There are days when even 2+2=4 fails to make sense. Other days, the even the vagaries just make sense.
What's the difference?
I have some ideas. Probably there is some biochemistry involved. Not enough sleep, too much food, not enough exercise.
Then there's the "worry" bug. This bug in the program keeps me spinning wheels. "Where do I start?" "How will this end?" "Will this ever end?" And the biggy, "If I'm so smart why aren't I rich?"
Balancing two businesses, both startups, in a down economy means it takes great vigilance not to slide into worry, with the attendant night sweats and insomnia.
And last but not least, the perennial favorite, beliefs about what success means. My 40th high school reunion is coming up. I'm great health, have a great family and. . . I'm essentially jobless.
Well, not quite true. I have a job and, as founder of the company, until we make money, I don't get a check. That was supposed to last a few months. We're now well into the third year. We close. . . we're always close. But around every corner, there seems to be another corner.
So, it's time to dig into those beliefs again. I don't think I'm loser. Sometimes it sure feels like it.
Ok, enough introspection for one day!
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